Passover... a Bariatric Post-op Lesson

Passover is probably my most favorite Jewish Holiday. To all my Jewish readers... wipe that look off your face! Yes I enjoy 8 days of matzah brei and nescafe. lol

I was thinking about this today while i was driving to work before I had  my coffee. Not sure what made me think of it but here it goes...

Passover is a holiday in which we celebrate the exodus from Egypt. We as Jews went from being slaves for 210 years to being free and the whole holiday is very symbolic. During the first two nights of the holidays we hold a feast which is a called a Seder which means order for those of you who don't speak Hebrew. It's a very organized event.

Everything we do, eat, say is very symbolic. We talking a lot about the idea of going from being slaves to free (wo)men. We drink wine and lean to left like kings while drinking and eating.

So I could take this one of two ways... One is the obvious of going from being a slave to our bodies, a slave to food, a slave to disease and then having surgery and being free but that while that's a lovely comparison, that's not where I am going tonight...

I was thinking this morning as I was driving about the concept of eating after weight loss surgery. We go from being slaves to our bodies and food to being... well... slaves to our bodies and food. How sad is that? Some of us are slaves to the scale while others become slaves to calorie counting or exercise or the worst of all... DIETING!!!

I have talked about this a lot in the past... NO MORE DIET MENTALITY!! One of the things I love about Judaism which hits home particularly during certain holidays is the idea of moderation. Jews can do anything but with moderation. We can eat, but not certain things. We can drink but only certain drinks. We can drive and play on facebook and watch TV etc but only on certain days... There is a time and place for everything. Even things we are not supposed to eat, drink and do are permitted under certain circumstances. Nothing is every 100% forbidden. I LOVE THIS!

On passover, we eat in excess, we drink in excess we act like kings for two nights out of the year. We don't feel guilt about it or shame. We are supposed to be excited and full of joy! So to in our post-op lives. I can't tell you how many patients I see that struggle to find balance in their post-op lives. There is a fear of eating certain foods,like a bite of cake, wearing certain clothes, like a bathing suit, going certain places like to a booth in the restaurant. Stop being afraid to live your life! It's ok to eat a bite or two of cake on some occasions! It's ok to show off your new body at times! It's ok to try new experiences and feel good about them! Learn moderation and let that replace the constant diet mentality or abstinence mentality if you will. Everything is ok under certain circumstances.

To me that is the message of Passover. So tomorrow night, I am going to eat a little too much, drink a little too much and feel like a Queen! No guilt, no shame and no self loathing. I'm not cheating, falling off some imaginary wagon, or being a bad girl. I am living life.

I hope you can all experience life the way I have learned to!
xoxo
Sleeve Pixie

Happy Passover

HAPPY PASSOVER!!

For happiness, good health, and cheer — at Passover and throughout the year!


I wanted to let you know I will be away celebrating the first few days of passover in Lancaster, PA. I will be out of touch until Thursday.

LISHANA HAZOT B'YIRUSHALAYIM!!

Dumping: A Reality of the Gastric Sleeve

So here I am, 26 minutes before the ball drops... and I am sick as a rabid dog. It is official... I have been in denial of this fact for a a little over a month and a half.

I AM A DUMPER!!! 

In fact, I am dumping as I type this blog entry. I feel gross.... So I am going to keep this short and sweet and go lie down.

The Mayo Clinic defines dumping syndrome as....

...a group of symptoms most likely to develop if you've had surgery to remove all or part of your stomach, or if your stomach has been surgically bypassed to help lose weight. occurs when the undigested contents of your stomach are transported or "dumped" into your small intestine too rapidly.

Generally we hear amongst the WLS community that sugar, carbs and fat will cause this to happen. For me this is true. I ate way too many carby audervs took 3 sips of alcohol and  topped it all off with pudding pie for dessert. I know, I know not the greatest choices but I am of the belief that this is not a diet but my life so if I want to eat pudding pie with my family on New Years Eve, then I am gonna do it! I am also going to accept that I will have to pay the piper for my actions. Believe me, I am not bitching. I am just telling you this happens.

The Symptoms of dumping may include all or some of the following:

1. Cramping or pain

2. Nausea

3. Diarrhea

4. Vomiting

5. Sweating

6. Fast Heart Rate

7. Tiredness

From the things I hear from my bypass friends... everyone experiences it differently. I get nausea, fast heart rate and tiredness.

Many surgeon's websites etc will tell you us sleevers don't dump because our Pylorus is preserved which is supposed to hold the food in our bananas but I have heard of many sleevers experience dumping. Last I checked it's about 3%. But that statistic is word of mouth and I have yet to find a study to verify that.

There is nothing, that I know of, you can do to stop the dumping episode once it's starts. You just have to wait it out and it will eventually pass. It is the worst feeling EVER!!!

I just wanted to throw that out there. It is NOT just bypassers!!! It is now 3 to midnight and I must go kiss my hubby for New Years.
Happy New Year!
xoxo
Sleeve Pixie

What is your New Years Resolution?

Enter December, the month for gift giving and receiving, for joy and charity and family. For some its a month filled with weight gain, drunk stupidity and/or relationship drama. It is also known as the Month when people start to think about their "failures" for the year and make resolutions to fix their real or perceived inferiorities in the year to come.

Making a resolution in my opinion, accomplishes one of two things. One, its is a just a way to shut your guilt up. If you feel guilty for not going to the gym enough, you say on December 30th... "SELF, in 2011, we are going to go to the gym 4 times every week!" Then you tell all your friends about your resolution and they nod and smile and some may even be honest enough to say, "Oh I wish I could do that too... but... I can't commit to so many times a week," but in all of their heads they are thinking... BULL SHIT! That Bish aint gonna last more than 2 weeks!

Two. It's a way to rationalize your behavior over the holidays. If you want to eat your piece of cake over the holidays, you will rationalize every bite with the stupid New Years Resolution. "Oh, I can totally eat the double chocolate fudge cake because I'm gonna go to the gym in 4x a week in 2011." "I can totally get wasted every night between Xmas and New Years Day because, well, obviously calories consumed during holiday season don't count. Besides, I made that resolution to hit the gym and burn off one drink per hour 4x a week in 2011."

Now let's get real! You and I both know... if going to the gym was THAT important to you you wouldn't wait til you were hungover on January 1st to go, you would go NOW! If you wanted to quit smoking, join weight watchers, the gym, have surgery finally, get that fill in your band etc etc etc you would do it NOW! Stop using your BS Resolution as your get out of jail free card.

A New years resolution is like starting your diet on Monday... Did you know there are 52 Mondays in a year? You are setting yourself up to fail ad feel horrible about yourself for not sticking to your resolution.

Instead of resolutions this year how bout we do something different. How bout we say to ourselves... This year, It is ok to gain 10lbs in the month of December. I will allow myself 3 bites of anything I want or a whole friggen piece of whatever I want and it wont mean I am a failure in life, WLS, weight watchers etc...

For 2011 lets set goals. Go right now and get a pen and paper..... I'm waiting.....
Got it?
GREAT!

Now write on the top my 2011 Goals.
Did you write it?
Good!

Now make a list of 3 goals you would like to accomplish this year. JUST 3!
Start each goal with the words... I WOULD BE SO HAPPY IF...
Make sure to skip a few line between each goal.
Here are mine....
1. I would be so happy if I weight less than 300lbs
2. I would be so happy if I was more active
3. I would be so happy if I got a social work job working for a bariatric surgeon/program

 We started by saying "I would be so happy if..." because that doesn't commit us to anything, doesn't berate us if we don't follow through, doesn't allow us to use it as an excuse or make a promise to ourself. Its just a simple statement of this is what would make me happy. Maybe, just maybe, your happiness will be a motivator.

Now go back to goal 1. Under your goal write... I can (insert goal here) if I (insert 2 activities here).
Do this for all three goals.

1. I would be so happy if I weight less than 300lbs

    I can weigh less than 300lbs if I measure my food daily and log my calories, carbs and protein daily.

2. I would be so happy if I was more active

    I can be more active if I walk the dogs with my husband and get a gym buddy.

3. I would be so happy if I got a social work job working for a bariatric surgeon/program

    I can get a social work job in a bariatric program if I get my resume together and send it out.

Now what you have done is implemented a reasonable plan to attain your goals. One more step... Go back to goal 1 and on the next line under your plan write.... If I don't (insert goal here) then (insert feeling, reaction here).

1. I would be so happy if I weight less than 300lbs

    I can weigh less than 300lbs if I measure my food daily and log my calories, carbs and protein daily.

    If I don't weight less than 300lbs then I will feel like a failure at surgery part 2 and resent my surgery.

2. I would be so happy if I was more active

    I can be more active if I walk the dogs with my husband and get a gym buddy.

    If I don't become more active, it is likely that I will not reach my first goal. 

3. I would be so happy if I got a social work job working for a bariatric surgeon/program

    I can get a social work job in a bariatric program if I get my resume together and send it out.

    If I don't get a job in a bariatric setting then I will get a job somewhere else. 

Now you have a goal, a plan to implement the goal and a motivator because you know you don't want to feel xyz or have reaction abc happen. For me. I have 5lbs to lose til I'm in twoderville so I know/assume goal 1 will happen eventually. I know if I don't get more active it is likely I wont reach goal, wont feel good about myself etc etc... If I don't land my dream job right now, which is possible I wont because most surgeons wont hire me til I reach goal, then I will have to settle for another job. These are my motivators. This is what I want to accomplish in 2011.

I hope you find this helpful to having a more meaningful 2011.

Happy New Years!

xoxo

Sleeve Pixie, LMSW!!!! 

PS.... For those of you who don't know, I have been MIA for the last 2 weeks studying 8-10 hours a day for my Licensing exam. I passed my licensing exam and I am now a Licensed Social Worker! What a great ending to 2010!!!

When You Can't Afford Your Health... Bah Humbug

As the holiday season is upon us, and everywhere you go the Christmas songs are playing, the world is usually in holiday spirits... As for me, all I have to say is "Bah Humbug". This morning I awoke to find myself in a familiar predicament. As we were sitting around the table eating breakfast my step-dad shared that he had been laid off from his job. Aside for the fact that jobs are scare to begin with, my step-dad is a Jeweler and with the passing of Christmas the Jewelry market essentially shuts down for the month of January. This means for us, that he has no chance of getting work til the end of January early February. Although my mom works, she doesn't make enough to cover the mortgage, the house bills, the food etc... We are all scared, especially me.

For a period of time when I had my lap-band, my husband and I were living in an apartment we couldn't afford and we were lucky to have one meal a day. We just couldn't afford to eat. As a result, the small amounts of money we did have usually wound up being spent on pizza or fast food because it was way cheaper that buying salads, chicken, fish etc.. I remember nights where we would turn the apartment upside down looking for lost change to buy food. This led us to having to move in with my mom a year ago because we just couldn't keep ourselves afloat. Well, here we are again. My parents are talking about what to do if they can't make the mortgage and it just takes me right back.

Healthy food is sooo expensive and there is so little I can actually get down. I don't want to fill my sleeve wit Pizza and junk food. I want to succeed. I NEED to succeed. I am afraid I will no longer be able to afford my vitamins or my health insurance. I already had to give my license plates back to the DMV due to an old lapse in insurance coverage. The second one in the last 3 years. I am afraid I wont have money to go to the gym and its just way too damn cold to go out walking.

What do you do, when you just can't afford to be healthy? Well, I refuse to fail. I refuse to let this get me down. I can't be that person anymore. So I have come up with a meal plan that will have to work for me, until this passes... This too shall pass...

My New Meal Plan 4 of these meals every day:
Chobani Yogurt w SF syrup
Egg Beaters with Organic Veggies
Canned Tuna with I tsp on RF Mayo
Organic Salad with Tuna
Protein Shake made with Skim Plus
1 slice of chicken breast with 1 slice of part skim cheese

This will bring my weekly grocery bill for just myself to $45 a week or $6.43 a day. This is less than the cost of a value meal at the local fast food joint. It's Healthy, full of protein and vitamins and minerals and will help me succeed. I AM A WINNER!! Granted I would also have to add approximately $25 a month to buy protein powder but it just so happens that I have one tub at home to start with. So that will save me some money for now.

Whenever things seem bleak and you don;t know how you can move forward... know there is always a way. Clip coupons, shop online for the best deals before you visit the stores, so whatever you have to do to make this work!

Wishing you all a happy holiday season!
xoxo
Sleeve Pixie

What a Day...

Yesterday was a crazy day!!! I cant even begin to fully describe it in words so lemme just show ya!

First I got all pertty to spend the day with my aunt and hubby... I was all excited that I was looking great, roaming around in 3.5inch high heel sexiness!

Then the day just progressed... I went out for brunch and had this fabulous cobb salad, which was the first thing in 3 days I didn't throw up...











Then hung out with aunt and hubby for the remainder of the day til my flight around 9pm. I forgot to change shoes so I wound up walking around the airport in these crazy shoes and guess what... NO PAIN! No foot pain, no knee pain no back pain!!!!!

Then I got on the airplane... Usually I don't even bother trying my seatbelt. I just throw my coat on like a blanket and pretend to be sleeping when the stewardess comes around so I don't have to ask for an extender. Well I figured to myself, lemme see.... and......

OH AND JUST IN CASE YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME...

Yep Thats right friends! NO EXTENDER!!!!!!!

To make for an even better ending... the tray table came down fully as did the arm!!! I can finally fit in one seat on the plane!!! Happy!!!!!!!

xoxo

Sleeve Pixie

Happy Chanukah!! The Festival of Light

Today is day 2 of the 8 day Jewish Holiday Called Chanukah (can you CH flem? If not, replace the CH with an H).

Chanukah is a time for family, celebration and joy -- and also a time for remembering the reasons for celebrating. 


This holiday is often called the "Festival of Light" and to me, its a time of newness and a time to start over. On the first night of this holiday we thank God for sustaining our lives so that we could experience a moment of joy. It reminds us that life is a gift and helps us to appreciate when something good happens.

Please don't think I am in any way pushing God or religion down your throat. That just isn't my style... If you believe in God, you do, if you don't, you don't. But I think the message is still relevant.

Today, we can be thankful for being alive. We didn't die on the table! We got our obesity before it got us. We won! Sometimes, life gets in the way and its hard VERY HARD to stay positive. I have literally had a week from hell. I have been arguing with my husband constantly, my hormones are ALL OVER the place, and to top it all off, I had to turn in my license plates for 32 days this morning because when my husband lost his job, we couldn't afford to pay car insurance and we had a lapse. I am devastated!! Now that I have my sleeve, I have lost my best friend, food!! No more love affair with my two favorite men. Ben and Jerry or crying over a bag of Double Stuffed Oreos... Nope! I still had to get up this morning, measure out my food, and move on with my life. Where is the happiness?? The Joy, the Blessing?? THE LIGHT???

For me, my new light is cooking. I have learned that I love to cook and my creations in the kitchen taste way way way better than a microwaved burger from the local fast food joint. My blessing is my husband, we just shared our 5th year anniversary and I am looking forward to many many more! My Joy is you! My friends, my support group, my family. My happiness can only come from within myself. It will never come from children, dogs, coach bags, OH conferences, the number on the scale, the new tummy tuck or boob job not even from the great lost love affair. It must come from within me! Like a wick held within the candle wax, the flame is held from within.

So I'm on a mission! I want you to light your flame!! Get on in to the kitchen and get cooking!! Chanukah is also a holiday, as are all the Jewish Holidays, jam packed with FOOOOOD! Fried food to remember the oil that burnt for 8 days...

My favorite Chanukah treat is Sufganiyot, which in English translates to deep fried Donuts (usually jelly even though I don't like Jelly). Even though this treat is NOT deep fried it is still donuts and VERY YUMMY!

Shelly's Mini Chocolate Mocha Protein Donuts

*This recipe has been reprinted for you with the permission of Shelly aka Eggface. 

It is my personal opinion, that Shelly is an angel and an excellent cook! She has saved me from Dunkin Donuts with her willingness to share recipes to replace the junk food I love. Everyone should check out her blog ~ The World According to Eggface

Ps. Shelly, please come out with a way to make us friendly double stuffed oreos! Thanks!!!

Ingredients1 cup Almond Flour (aka Almond Meal) 
1/2 cup Chocolate Protein Powder 
1/2 cup Multigrain Pancake Mix 
1 teaspoon Baking Powder
1 Taster's Choice Instant Coffee Tube
1 Egg, beaten
3 Tablespoons Sugar Free Syrup (I used SF Vanilla)
1 Tablespoon Canola Oil
1/4 cup Water
Super Groovy Mini Donut Pan


DirectionsPreheat oven to 325. 
Mix all ingredients till well combined. 
Spray Mini Donut Pans with Pam. 
Fill 1/2 full with batter (batter is the consistency of brownie batter). 
Bake for 8 minutes, remove from pan and cool on wire rack.



Donut Glaze
4 Mini Sugar Free Chocolate Bars (or milk, dark or white chocolate)
1 Tablespoon Sugar Free Syrup (any flavor will do)

Nuke for 30 seconds or so till melted. Stir to combine. Coats 12 donuts. 

For colored/flavored frosting: combine SF white chocolate & 3 drops or so of food coloring, SF Syrup and nuke for 30 seconds or so till melted. Stir to combine.

Dip cooled donuts into chocolate glaze and then into optional toppings.


Topping Ideas:
Crushed SF Candy (SF Candy Canes, SF Malted Milk Balls, SF Jordan Almonds)
Toasted or Untoasted Unsweetened Coconut
Crushed Nuts (Peanuts, Hazelnuts, Almonds)
Crushed Sugar Free Cookies
Peanut Butter Flour
SF Cocoa Powder 

Happy Chanukah!!

xoxo

Sleeve Pixie

I Gained A WHOLE POUND Over Thanksgiving!!!

So here we are friends and Thanksgiving is over. All the preparation, cooking and table setting is done. The dishes are washed, the pants are unbuttoned and the scale is not your friend today... What now?

I spent Thanksgiving picking at my grandmother's amazing food all day. I made sugar free trifle and citrus glazed salmon with avocado salsa. I never even ate a bite of the healthy, bariatric friendly food I made because by the time it was ready, surprise surprise, I was stuffed.

To my surprise, the next morning I stepped on the scale as I do every morning, and I had gained a whole pound!! ONE WHOLE POUND! MY LIFE IS OVER! I'M A FAILURE AGAIN! THIS IS NEVER GOING TO WORK! I GIVE UP!!! That is where my mind used to go. Every time I stepped on the weight watchers scale, every time I went to my previous surgeon for a fill and didn't lose. I was "all or nothing" girl. I am willing to bet that this description relates to you too... or at least it did at one point in your life.

We, you and I, can make a pact right now. We can decide to act play a different tape when the scale isn't being so friendly. Are you ready for that? I am! Now is the time... Ready, set... GO!

Say this out loud to yourself.. Post it on the wall next to your scale and don't ever forget this!
"If i get on the scale today, and I don't like the number I see. I will get off the scale and continue with my day. I will say to myself, "Life happens. I am not a failure. I am a success. This is not a diet this is my life and I am entitled to indulge once in a while. Today is a new day and a fresh start and I am worth it!"

This is my new attitude. I am DONE with dieting... This is real life my friends. I will have my sleeve forever. As you will have your tool forever. If I choose to eat a few more calories then I should on a holiday, birthday, anniversary or when I go away with my family and I gain a pound or two or dare I say it...FIVE POUNDS... guess what? Life goes on. I will tighten the reins the next day or week and the weight will be gone. I refuse to deprive myself of food forever. If I want a bite of a cookie on my birthday then so be it. I will manage, not suffer, but manage the consequences.

I implore you to adopt this new attitude of LIFE and living it to the fullest of your ability. I believe in balance. Balance does not mean perfection it means enjoying both the good and bad in such a way that neither have a hold of your actions, emotions and reactions.

I wish you all a very happy holiday season filled with love, family, friends, life and balance!

xoxo
Sleeve Pixie